Parrish meets up with Blue, Dickie and Chauncey for a boys' night out. Parrish goes through sixteen very different women and must choose one for his date for the night.
Stiletto University Q & A: When is it time to stop dating someone?
C from New Jersey wrote me at stilettou.com asking for advice on when to quit. She asks:
I've been seeing a guy for nearly four months and things have been going very well. But it wasn't until I told him how much I was feeling him that he told me that I wasn't the only woman he was dating. He still wants to see me and I really like him. We're great together. Should I just wait it out?
The fact that he waited until you declared your feelings to let you know that you were one of several moths flitting around his flame is telling. It sounds like your guy is letting you know that he's not ready to settle down yet. He's made his position clear, and now the next move is yours.
A red flag went up in my mind when you said that you'd already been dating four months before he told you that your relationship was not exclusive. If you were under that impression, then I'd say might be dealing with a player who all about having his cake and eating it too. However, if your relationship was not understood to be a 'just us' kind of thing, then I think he's trying to let you know that he's still keeping his options open, no matter how great you are together. When a man finds the woman he wants to build his world around, he stops looking for what else is out there. Take him by his actions and not his words.
The bigger question here is: What do you want? Are you looking for a serious relationship? Marriage perhaps, or are you content playing the field yourself? This is your life. You are the one in charge of deciding what is or isn't acceptable. You now know the truth. If you decide to keep dating him, keep your options open as well. But if you're looking to settle down, don't limit yourself in a relationship that has little potential. My advice is to end things on a sweet and positive note, and keep on moving. One of two things will happen, either you'll find a guy who is as content and happy with you as you are with him, or Mr. Popular will realize the error of his wandering ways and come back. Either way, you'll be happy knowing that you never settled for less than you deserved.
Good luck! If you have a dating or relationship question, ask on stilettou.com or @stilettou on Twitter.
C from New Jersey wrote me at stilettou.com asking for advice on when to quit. She asks:
I've been seeing a guy for nearly four months and things have been going very well. But it wasn't until I told him how much I was feeling him that he told me that I wasn't the only woman he was dating. He still wants to see me and I really like him. We're great together. Should I just wait it out?
The fact that he waited until you declared your feelings to let you know that you were one of several moths flitting around his flame is telling. It sounds like your guy is letting you know that he's not ready to settle down yet. He's made his position clear, and now the next move is yours.
A red flag went up in my mind when you said that you'd already been dating four months before he told you that your relationship was not exclusive. If you were under that impression, then I'd say might be dealing with a player who all about having his cake and eating it too. However, if your relationship was not understood to be a 'just us' kind of thing, then I think he's trying to let you know that he's still keeping his options open, no matter how great you are together. When a man finds the woman he wants to build his world around, he stops looking for what else is out there. Take him by his actions and not his words.
The bigger question here is: What do you want? Are you looking for a serious relationship? Marriage perhaps, or are you content playing the field yourself? This is your life. You are the one in charge of deciding what is or isn't acceptable. You now know the truth. If you decide to keep dating him, keep your options open as well. But if you're looking to settle down, don't limit yourself in a relationship that has little potential. My advice is to end things on a sweet and positive note, and keep on moving. One of two things will happen, either you'll find a guy who is as content and happy with you as you are with him, or Mr. Popular will realize the error of his wandering ways and come back. Either way, you'll be happy knowing that you never settled for less than you deserved.
Good luck! If you have a dating or relationship question, ask on stilettou.com or @stilettou on Twitter.
Consider this...
Lori Bryant-Woolridge is a sensuality coach and advocate for healthy, sensual lifestyles. An Emmy award-winning writer, she has authored three best selling novels.
